


coming down

by orphan_account



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Light Dom/sub, M/M, One Night Stands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-29
Updated: 2019-12-29
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:34:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22009207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: after a couple of soppy fluff fics, I decided to do a U-turn and try my hand at writing smut for the first time in like a decade plus!
Relationships: Yuzuru Hanyu/Other(s)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 24





	coming down

**Author's Note:**

> after a couple of soppy fluff fics, I decided to do a U-turn and try my hand at writing smut for the first time in like a decade plus!

’It will help you increase muscle mass more quickly and safely’, his physiotherapist Dr. Miller had said, gesturing to a set of elastic bands laid out on the desk between them. ‘It’s called the kaatsu method, invented by a Japanese guy back in the sixties.’  
Yuzuru had listened intently and nodded, hands resting on his lap.  
‘The point is that they restrict the blood flow, which forces your muscles to work harder than usual. You’ll see results faster. Just clip these on’ – Dr. Miller demonstrated opening and closing the metal clasp on one of the bands – ‘And do your usual workout routine. The most important thing to remember is timing. Make sure you never keep the band on for more than five minutes a go, or it can get dangerous. Got it?’  
‘Yes, sounds very good. It’s just like what I’m looking for’, Yuzuru said, picking up the bands and examining them in his hands. They were all black and looked quite stylish, almost like leather. ‘Thank you so much, Dr. Miller’.  
Yuzuru was truly grateful for having such a resourceful support team. He had never heard of this method of training before, although it had apparently been invented in Japan, yet now his PT in Toronto was recommending it to him out of the blue. There was a spring in his step as he walked from Dr. Miller’s office to the Cricket gym – he was excited to test out this new toy right away. 

Putting the kaatsu bands on for the first time felt strange. Yuzuru couldn’t quite figure out whether he liked the sensation or not. He had slipped two of the bands around the thickest parts of his thighs, secured the clasps in his fingers and clicked them shut, the unexpectedly loud sound of the buckles reverbating in the pit of his stomach. Immediately, he could feel the blood flow being constricted. It was a very simple mechanism, sure, but it would take some time to get used to the effect. Yuzuru started going through his usual exercises, having set an alarm on his phone in preparation to make sure the timing was safe. 

Working out like this definitely felt more effective, if ‘effectiveness’ was measured by how exhausting it felt, which was often the case. After repeating the first set of his prescribed motions, Yuzuru glanced at his phone screen – just a minute had passed. He probably wouldn’t be able to keep doing this for a full five. His legs already felt like lead, as if he had ran five miles or completed a four-quad program. In addition to the exhaustion, though, there was another sensation bothering Yuzuru: the feeling of constriction in his legs was inexplicably making him hard. He didn’t really have time to ponder on it, but intuitively, it didn’t seem to make sense – if the whole point was to restrict the flow of blood to intensify training, then why did it seem to have the opposite effect on this part of his body? He pushed it aside, focusing on getting through a second set of motions, trying to decide whether to go for the third or give up. Never a quitter, he made up his mind to push for the third. 

After finishing, he ended up collapsing – newly unbuckled, his legs gave way from under him. Panting on the floor for a minute or two, he gradually felt his arousal fading away as glibly as it had appeared. Yuzuru didn’t like his body playing weird tricks on him like this, but at least the kaatsu training had seemed effective, so dealing with an unwanted hard-on was a small price to pay. Hopefully it wouldn’t happen again – maybe his lower body had just been confused by this new torture device. 

\---

Unfortunately, the same problem kept occurring nearly every time Yuzuru used the kaatsu bands, which was almost every day now, as the method did work wonders in building his body for the upcoming season. It was kind of mortifying. It couldn’t be that his body actually enjoyed the feeling of his legs being cut off from the rest of him at mid-thigh – why on earth was it reacting like this? Thankfully Yuzuru’s black training pants were loose enough that nobody else using the gym would be alerted to his condition, but it was embarrassing nonetheless. 

‘That looks cool’, Jun-hwan called out to him one afternoon as he was midway through his routine, walking up to observe the band from up close. ‘What is it?’  
Yuzuru felt his face becoming red – just how much blood was his body actually storing, to transport to so many places at once?  
‘Um, can’t really talk right now’, Yuzuru said, flustered.  
‘Yeah, looks hardcore’, Jun-hwan agreed, nodding. ‘Maybe I’ll try that at some point, too.’  
Yuzuru tried to smile, but it probably came across as a grimace. Mercifully, Jun-hwan soon lost interest and went off to continue his own workout. Yuzuru gritted his teeth, angry at his body for constantly betraying him.

\---

At some point during the weeks of off-season training, as Yuzuru had just finished closing the clasps around his thighs, it finally clicked.  
‘I’m probably into bondage’, he thought, observing the way in which the black band was biting into the softness of his thigh, the bulging of cloth-covered skin above and below its strip. It was kind of obvious, now that he really looked at it.  
But what to do with this information?  
Nothing, at the moment. Yuzuru filed it away, keeping at his training, continuing to ignore his irritating arousal.  
‘Know your enemy’, he thought, detached. There was a week to go until his first competition, he was able to keep going for four and a half minutes now, and the results were already visible to the naked eye – everything was going according to the plan. 

\---

Everything was going according to the plan – Yuzuru was untouchable in Kelowna, soaring high in Sapporo – until it wasn’t. Such was life. Yuzuru had always thrived in front of adversity, clambering up walls until his nails drew blood, enjoying the thrill of the chase.  
There was no thrill in defeat, in itself, though. Yuzuru didn’t really consider himself a masochist in that way.

His heart sunk to the bottom of his stomach the split second he made that mistake in the short, years of experience telling him just how costly it would be. His mind kept replaying that moment over and over and over again – when he was waiting for his score in the Kiss and Cry (thank heavens that comrade Pooh was there to squeeze, otherwise he might have really broken down in tears), while answering to dumb questions in the press conference (‘Yes, I’m considering an identity change into a Ms. Hanyunovna and a new start to my career in Tutberidge’s camp in Moscow’, he kind of wanted to joke, but just didn’t have the energy, and besides, this poor Russian reporter might have taken it seriously), on the bus ride back to his hotel. This kind of thing had happened to him so many times, but it never really got easier.  
‘Just shut up’, he mouthed to his brain, leaning his forehead against the bus window, but it wouldn’t work. Evening fell early in Italy in December, and the world was already pitch-dark. Yuzuru could feel a sleepless night coming in, all gears in his mind and body switched to overdrive and no way to turn them off. 

\---

‘I know myself too well’, he though, lying wide awake at 2AM.  
At least his hotel room was spacious, with big windows, and the sheets were cool and comfortable. He sat up, feeling the soreness in his muscles.  
‘If I could just get two or three hours of sleep, that would get me through.’  
Tomorrow was important. He had every intention to turn over a new leaf, create some kind of a memory that would be powerful enough to overtake the horrible split second from yesterday. But doing that would be much harder if he got no sleep at all. 

Suddenly, Yuzuru had an idea.  
He knew his body well – masturbating was a pleasant way to kill some time during long hours of insomnia, but the resulting orgasm would hardly be powerful enough to take the edge off this kind of anxiety. But what if he could improve his routine by trying something new?

Yuzuru got up and rummaged through his suitcase. He hadn’t really been doing kaatsu training as regularly now that the season was in full swing, but he still carried the set of bands with him – they weighed next to nothing, and Yuzuru liked being prepared for anything. 

He took out two of the bands and walked to the window, without turning the lights on. The soft glow of street lamps below reached through faintly to his room, illuminating the white skin of his thighs as he strapped the bands on. Curiously, even in its current nervous state, and without the exercise normally associated with the bands, his lower half reacted to the sudden loss of blood flow in the now-familiar way – arousal creeped through his body, a flush spreading across his face and his cock becoming half-hard almost immediately.  
‘It seems to be something like a Pavlovian reaction’, Yuzuru pondered, quickly stroking himself to full hardness. He shouldn’t waste any time – he hadn’t turned on an alarm on his phone, convinced that he could make himself come in much less than five minutes.

Without the repetitive and exhausting muscle exercises to take up his energy, Yuzuru’s mind started wondering while he stroked himself in fast, light motions. Looking down on his body, he imagined the bands on his thighs becoming ropes – multiplying, snaking around his legs to form circular looping patterns, binding him down.. Someone with a big, warm body would push their erection against the backs of his constricted thighs from behind, mercilessly grinding against him while holding him down, using him for their pleasure without offering any respite for his own arousal.. With a surprisingly loud gasp, Yuzuru came all over his stomach, slightly embarrassed by the turn his mind had taken. Was that what he really wanted, being tied up and manhandled by someone, or was it just another strange physical response to the Kaatsu bands? 

Yuzuru prided himself on being able to objectively evaluate the condition of his body and his mind, but this was becoming a point of confusion. He was no clueless virgin, but neither had he really explored the sensual side of himself in that much depth. He tended to think about sexuality as something natural, pure, but ultimately quite uninteresting, trying to not dwell on it that much. Of course eroticism was a powerful weapon for any performer, and Yuzuru got a thrill out of attracting the right kind of attraction from the right people sometimes, feeling triumphant. But the actual act of sex, he rarely found the time for – there had been a couple of times he’d given in to the temptation, maybe just out of curiosity - and it had been good, but hardly life-changing. He had followed the lead of his parters, who had been attractive and kind, but rather unadventurous. Just how much was there to discover, if he got down to it? Yuzuru sighed and thought it was pointless to even think about this now, when there were so many more important things to do, starting with restoring his physical condition with sleep. He set the issue aside, having a quick cold shower to clean up and cool down and falling back into bed, into sleep, finally achieving some precious rest. 

\---

Yuzuru jolted awake a few hours later, light pouring in from the windows. Today was an important day – a chance to overcome the heavy burden of yesterday’s disappointment. His expectations for himself were high, and so was the level of anxiety right from the moment he woke up; but at least his body felt good, definitely rested enough. Yuzuru got up and stretched carefully, pacing around his room while devising a game plan for the day. He could feel it in his fingertips, that something interesting was going to happen today, but he didn’t quite know what it was yet. 

\---

The ‘something’ turned out to be the monster of Yuzuru’s dreams, a waking nightmare that should turn into a thing of beauty once tamed. As he settled into his warm-up routine in the open practice, it came to him like a revelation: his coaches were not here, he was still brimming with the unsettled energy from yesterday, and his condition felt good. Maybe the gods were telling him something: To throw himself into the air, wild abandon and careful precision in equal measures – but the former still dominated, sweeping him up in unexpected trajectories, spitting him out against the ice over and over again. It hurt, but it felt necessary, and healing. He was making peace with his boundaries, finding his real limits at the moment. It was only much later that Yuzuru felt a flash of embarrassment – had he made himself look like a fool, failing so spectacularly? Regardless, it had been worth it for the rush of the moment, the greatest rush he had experienced in a long time. 

\---

It was overwhelming, to be looking at the same Olympic rings Plushenko would have gazed at a gold medal around his neck, while preparing to pay respect to his Nijinsky. Well, Yuzuru felt Origin was truly his own at this point, but bringing it back to Torino was like temporarily returning the program to its past life. His condition was still good, and Ghislain had lifted a heavy weight off his shoulders by returning to his side. Unwittingly, he heard himself laugh light and carefree through the warm-up, even as his heart was beating like a little bird with a sharp beak, jolting against his ribcage. 

All things considered, his crazy plan worked better than expected. Yuzuru felt soaring and grounded at the same time, connecting with the ice and the air and everyone around him. Gasping for air as the music faded away, he felt he had received strength from beyond his own self – from the audience, from the Olympic spirit sealed within the arena, from Ghislain, from the naive superstition that good things should happen on one’s birthday.. Whatever it was, it had worked. 

There had been a mistake, yes, but he had miraculously pulled off everything he had been really worried about, and that had to be good enough for now. It had to be. Unlike after the short, the split-second of the mistake did not keep replaying in his mind, no matter how costly it had been. He was still burning, but it was less painful than before.

\---

For the rest of the weekend, Yuzuru felt himself brimming with anxious energy. Thanks to the rush of joyous adrenaline from the free, he didn’t feel depressed – he just needed to find another outlet, something to take the edge off.  
‘It just takes some time’, he told himself, bouncing around the rink during gala practice, shrieking as Ondrej lifted him and spun him around in the air as if he weighed nothing.  
It felt good, depending on another person like that. It made Yuzuru hungry for something more, something he could not quite name.  
He could feel another idea forming in his hyperactive mind.  
‘This seems to be an opportune weekend for trying new things..’  
Maybe he could kill two birds with one stone: come back to planet Earth from his post-competition rush, and figure out some things about himself. What was it about the state of being constricted that made him so aroused? Ever eager to use himself as experiment zero, Yuzuru wanted to find some answers. And it felt right, to be fortright about his blind spots on his 25th birthday – if not now, when? 

\---

Yuzuru was used to men staring at him when he was dressed as the swan, their eyes following the steep drop of the illusion mesh on his back, caressing his waist, lingering on his collarbones. He didn’t mind it one bit – in fact, that was one of the reasons he had decided to bring this costume back today. Well, he would have done it anyway, since Notte Stellata was such an obvious choice of program to perform here. Yuzuru was always one to rise to the occasion, no matter how obvious and sentimental. But now that he had made up his mind to find someone who could help him out, wearing this costume felt all the more ingenious. 

Becoming the Swan required a pure heart, and Yuzuru forgot all thoughts of physical delights while gliding across the rink, focusing his whole being on perfecting soft, careful movements. He only allowed himself the pleasure of soaking up the adoring cheers as he performed the Biellman spin after its long absence, relishing the painful arch of his back. 

Yet he knew he was glowing; it was the very innocence of this Swan, a seemingly unaware sensuality, that attracted bystanders like moths to a flame. During the finale, Yuzuru could feel one person, in particular, trying to close the distance over and over again – Michael Marinaro, a Canadian pairs skater. Yuzuru didn’t know him – they had never had a conversation – but that suited him all the better. Marinaro was tall enough, broad enough, and most definitely besotted enough for Yuzuru’s purposes. 

It didn’t take much anything to convince Marinaro. He approached Yuzuru after the group number, pulling him in for a hug that was much tighter than expected from someone he was barely acquaintanced with, and spread his hands across Yuzuru’s waist. The way in which his arms encircled Yuzuru’s middle, holding him firmly, made Yuzuru feel he would be able to provide what he needed.  
Wasting no time, Yuzuru gripped him even closer and whispered in his ear: ‘Do you want to come to my room after the banquet?’  
Marinaro’s stunned silence, giving way to a disbelieving laugh, was all the answer Yuzuru needed. 

\---

Yuzuru didn’t stick around the banquet for very long. The place was fancy, sure, but he wasn’t in the mood to mingle with everyone or to treat himself to a large meal. He took a few pictures with the younger skaters, smiling politely, ruffling their hair, complimenting their performances. His heart wasn’t really in it, though, and it was barely eight o’clock when he decided to head off. 

Undressing and putting on a thin white hotel bathrobe, Yuzuru felt nervous and confident at the same time. This wasn’t something he usually did, inviting someone to his room that brazenly, practically promising to open his legs to a total stranger – ‘this is slutty behaviour’, he thought, and the words made him inexplicably aroused – but the ease with which he could find a perfect target made him feel powerful. 

He rummaged his suitcase to find the necessary things; a surprising number of items would fit into this small suitcase. Of course, one thing Yuzuru did not currently possess was the thick jute robe that had suddenly floated up in his imagination – but that was maybe something for the future.. It wasn’t something he could suddenly spring up on an one-night stand, anyway, but something that required more careful selection and discussion. For tonight, he just wanted to test a couple of things, to focus on things he might have willfully ignored before. 

Yuzuru wasn’t sure how long it would take for Marinaro to knock on his door, so he decided to make the most of the time spent waiting. He took a shower, blow-dried his hair to make it look fluffy – he was going for a softer look – and applied some moisturiser and lip gloss. He nodded at his reflection in the mirror, pink lips nicely matching the rosy colour that had spread across his cheeks in anticipation. Yuzuru tiptoed back to the bed, arranging himself on top of the duvet, pretending someone was already watching him in that large empty room. He was always aware of how the lines of his body looked, down to the position of each finger, but especially so after performing the Swan. He still felt himself partially embodying that character, the soft vulnerability that was so different from the one he’d played the day before. 

In this mindset, it was easier to confront the questions circling around his mind. Did he really want to give up control, or was it just a feverish thought brought about by some fleeting and ultimately meaningless impulse? Since a too-young age, he had been aware that a lot of men saw him like that – as fragile, as someone they would like to overpower into submission – just because of his physical appearance. He had always been careful not to dwell too much on that, to focus on the fact that he was strong and willful, a top-class athlete. But what if submissiveness was something he could explore on his own terms, separate from his everyday self out on the ice? What if the whole Kaatsu thing wasn’t just a response to specific physical stimulus, but an indication of something more than that? 

Yuzuru let himself drift back to the brief fantasy from the previous night, stroking himself over the thin fabric of the bathrobe, not allowing himself to go further than, not yet: the ropes binding his legs together, a large hand pushing down on his back, forcing his head into the pillows.. The man, this strange indeterminate man of his fantasies, would be sliding his cock along the curve of Yuzuru’s ass, just on the verge of pushing in, trying to make Yuzuru beg for it – and Yuzuru would be so happy to beg, he would say the most mortifying things just to make this man finally fill him up. He would thrash against the larger body behind him, trying to gain friction, but he could barely move because of the ropes binding his legs and the strong hand pushing him down. Each time he would move even just a little bit, the ropes would bite deeper into the soft skin of his thighs, a rough sensation that would only make him more desperate in his arousal. ‘Please, please just fuck me already’, he would cry out, but the man behind him would just laugh, sliding his cock between Yuzuru’s thighs, slicking them up with his precum but refusing to put it in or to touch Yuzuru’s own straining cock. It would be too much, and – 

There was a knock on the door. Yuzuru snapped out of his daydream, still slightly breathless with arousal, and got out of bed.  
‘I’m glad you came’, he greeted Marinaro with a smile.  
‘I’m glad I came’, Marinaro repeated dumbly, eyes fixed on Yuzuru’s collarbone, which was exposed by the bathrobe. Yuzuru didn’t mind. He turned on his heel, walking back to the bed with a sway in his hips, and sat down on the edge.  
‘This isn’t something I usually do’, Yuzuru said, confessional. ‘In fact, I’ve never done this before.’  
‘Really?’  
‘Really’, Yuzuru said, eyes wide, sincere. ‘I’m sorry if I’m not any good.’  
‘Oh’ – Marinaro scoffed, ‘You are perfect.’  
Yuzuru smiled. ‘Come here and kiss me.’ 

From up close, Marinaro wasn’t beautiful – his face was a bit harsh, angular – but that didn’t matter in the slightest. He was a hungry kisser and rubbed possessive circles over Yuzuru’s back and sides as they kissed, still sitting up on the edge of the bed.  
‘Actually, I have a request’, Yuzuru said. ‘I’m sorry if you don’t like. Or if you think it’s too weird. It’s something I been thinking about – like – a fantasy.’  
‘Let me hear it’, Marinaro said breathlessly.  
‘Um.. this is a bit..’ Yuzuru blushed and looked away, playing up his flustered state.  
‘I want you to be rough on me’, he said in a small voice. He could feel Marinaro’s cock jump against his hip, where their bodies were in close connection. ‘Maybe like.. pretend you are a stranger who is um.. forcing me to do things.’  
Yuzuru briefly glanced at Marinaro’s face and saw his eyes were glazed over with lust – surely a good sign.  
‘Are you sure?’  
Yuzuru nodded firmly.  
‘I’m not going to, like, hurt you – and if you want to stop, just say so.. But I don’t have a problem with playing it rough’, Marinaro said with a smile. ‘OK. Now take off your bathrobe.’  
Yuzuru stood up, letting his robe fall to the floor, exposing himself. His face felt flushed, and his chest probably was, too. He looked away bashfully. It wasn’t just an act – this wasn’t an usual situation. He was getting everything he wanted, for once, allowing himself to just enjoy this; and it was rather overwhelming. 

‘Beautiful’, Marinaro said. ‘Now, I want your pretty mouth on my cock.’  
Yuzuru nodded, falling down on his knees in front of the bed, nuzzling his cheek against the front of Marinaro’s slacks. He had clearly come straight from the banquet, still wearing his suit. Yuzuru enjoyed the sensation of the smooth fabric covering Marinaro’s erection, mouthing against it, creating a wet patch across the front of his slacks. Marinaro sighed, pushing against Yuzuru’s face, until he decided he’d had enough and grabbed Yuzuru’s shoulders to make him stop.  
‘Let me get out of my clothes, it will be even better that way’, he said breathlessly, standing up to undress.  
Marinaro had a nice body; tall and muscular, not that broad, but much broader than Yuzuru. Sitting with his legs tucked under him on the floor, Yuzuru looked up at him, licking his lips. 

Marinaro took his time folding his clothes away, then sat back down on the bed and grabbed Yuzuru’s head.  
‘Now let me see what you can do with those cocksucker lips’, he said, pushing his cock into Yuzuru’s mouth. Yuzuru could count on one hand the blowjobs he had given in his life, but he tried his best to remember all the things he’d learned so far, keeping his mouth slack and his tongue flat against his teeth. He lapped experimentally at Marinaro’s cock, which was thick but not particularly long, easier for him to handle. Yuzuru still struggled to take its full length as Marinaro tangled his hands into Yuzuru’s hair, taking full control of the pace. It felt overwhelming, and incredibly arousing, Marinaro gripping the back of his head and fucking his face, grunting with abandon. There was nothing in Yuzuru’s mind except the need to respond to Marinaro’s demands, to allow himself to be used like this. It felt purifying.  
‘Fuck, you’re so good’, he panted, jamming his cock against the boundary of Yuzuru’s throat and making him gag. He felt one of Marinaro’s hands on his face, wiping away stray tears that leaked from his eyes, as the other hand was still firmly tangled in his hair, holding his head in place.  
‘I think I’m gonna –’ 

Marinaro pulled out of Yuzuru’s mouth a split second before his orgasm, coming over Yuzuru’s face. Yuzuru just about managed to close his eyes, feeling ribbons of cum streaming down his cheeks and his nose, catching on to his eyelashes and making his face feel sticky all over.  
‘That’s a pretty sight’, Marinaro said, patting Yuzuru on the head.  
‘Don’t worry, I’m not done with you yet. Gonna clean you up so we can play some more.. Just sit there and wait. Don’t move.’  
Yuzuru closed his eyes and obeyed, sitting still as he heard Marinaro go get paper towels from the bathroom and return. He didn’t move as Marinaro wiped his face and neck down with the towels. There were barely any thoughts in his head. He didn’t remember particularly enjoying the previous blowjobs he had given, sloppy and slow and frustrating, but this had been a new experience. It was like everything else was wiped away from the time being, he was just listening to Marinaro’s voice, following the guidance of his hands – it resembled the strange feeling from his fantasy, and made him so, so, aroused, his cock throbbing between his thighs. Taking notice, Marinaro placed his hand over Yuzuru’s cock, stroking it with barely-there, featherlight touches.  
‘Ah’, Yuzuru cried out. ‘Please’, he breathed, eyes shut, not sure what he was asking for. He didn’t really want to come yet – being in this state of heavy, mindless arousal felt good, and he wanted to stay here, close to the edge, for a while longer. Marinaro seemed to understand that, withdrawing his hand. He placed his hands under Yuzuru’s arms, pulling him up from the floor and pushing him on his back on the bed. Standing at the foot of the bed, looking over at Yuzuru’s body, Marinaro smiled at him.  
‘You look like such a mess, just from giving me a blowjob. It’s incredible’, he said, genuine appreciation in his voice. Yuzuru looked back at Marinaro, seeing he was becoming hard again. ‘I’m going to fuck you’, Marinaro said, voice rougher than before. ‘Yes, please’, Yuzuru responded, barely even registering that he had spoken. Marinaro got on the bed, climbing over Yuzuru and kissing him hungrily, teeth grazing over his lower lip. ‘Where’s your lube?’ Marinaro asked, and Yuzuru pointed to the bedside table, where he had thankfully had the good sense to place both his lube and his condoms. Marinaro grabbed the tube, squeezing a liberal amount of it on its hands.  
‘Turn around’, he said, grabbing Yuzuru’s hips and pushing him on his stomach. ‘You’re not a virgin, right?’  
Yuzuru shook his head. ‘Have only done it a couple of times, though’, he said.  
‘What if I don’t believe you’, Marinaro said. ‘Seems to me that you’re an insatiable little slut. Well, no matter – I’m going to wreck you, no matter how many cocks you’ve taken before.’  
Yuzuru quietly smiled to himself, amused. He appreciated Marinaro’s little act – or maybe it was his real bravado coming through. He soon felt two of Marinaro’s slicked-up fingers pushing inside him, scissoring him open, making him gasp against a pillow.  
‘So sensitive’, Marinaro said, thrusting his fingers inside Yuzuru more quickly. After a minute, he added a third finger, making Yuzuru thrash out against him, seeking more friction.  
‘Need more’, Yuzuru whined, ‘please put it in, please...’  
‘Do I need to use a condom?’ Marinaro asked, and Yuzuru shook his head from side to side in an exaggerated motion. ‘We’re all tested’, he said, one of the few benefits of one-night stands with fellow athletes. In the heat of the moment, Yuzuru liked the idea of direct contact without anything in between, undiluted.  
‘Get properly on your knees’, Marinaro said, and Yuzuru obliged, canting his hips up.  
It had been a long time since he’d done this with anyone, and the first push of Marinaro inside him was overwhelming, but it didn’t take long for him to get used to it.  
‘Fuck, you’re so tight, I can almost believe you don’t do this every night’, Marinaro said, holding Yuzuru’s hips in place and pushing slowly in and out of him. It felt like teasing, the gradual slide in and out, always slightly out of reach – not touching the place where Yuzuru most wanted him.  
‘Faster, please’, Yuzuru gasped.  
Marinaro wouldn’t oblige for a while, continuing his torturously slow thrusts – one, two, three – until he finally decided he’d also had enough, losing his patience. He let himself slip out of Yuzuru and then slammed back in hard, filling Yuzuru all the way and making him cry out – ‘ah, it’s too much, feels too much-‘  
Marinaro splayed his hand on Yuzuru’s back, pushing his upper body down, sliding his hand up and down the smooth curve of Yuzuru’s spine.  
‘You just stay there and take it-‘  
Yuzuru felt Marinaro’s hand moving from his spine to the back of his neck, not pushing down; but just the ghost of touch was enough to push him over the edge. He cried out and came hard, his body losing all tension and growing limp. Marinaro held him up, hips pistoning into him rapidly, until Yuzuru felt his rhythm stuttering, warm, sticky cum spilling inside him. Marinaro quickly pulled out, panting hard.  
‘Fuck, that was something’, he said after a minute. ‘Such a mess’, he commented, looking at his cum leaking out of Yuzuru. ‘Stay there, I’ll get something to clean you up, and the sheets too..’  
‘I’m thinking, we should have a shower.’  
Yuzuru stretched lazily, feeling his senses slowly return to normal. The prospect of being filled with cum had seemed hot in his state of desperate arousal, but was highly uncomfortable now.  
‘That’s not a bad idea.. I’m all spent, though, genuinely.’  
‘Me too’, Yuzuru smiled. ‘Let’s just, get clean. For real.’  
So they did. Marinaro spread soap all over Yuzuru’s body and carefully washed it away, briefly massaging his shoulders while he was at it. It felt good to just let someone take care of him like that.

‘This was very good experience for me. Thank you’, Yuzuru said, after he’d been thoroughly cleaned, wrapped in a big fluffy towel and tucked back into bed. ‘The truth is, I never try this kind of thing before. Like – asking someone to be specially rough to me. I wasn’t sure if I would like it. And I was a bit afraid of trying’, he explained, feeling the need to be sincere, for some reason.  
‘I’m glad. It was great for me, too’, Marinaro said. ‘To be honest, it felt like a fever dream. I can’t believe you’d want to have sex with me of all people and – to trust me with something new like that.’  
‘You’re worth trust’, Yuzu said, closing his eyes and sighing. ‘I’m very sleepy now.’  
‘I get it, I’ll go’, Marinaro said, smirking. ‘I’ll see you around. Happy birthday, by the way.’  
Yuzuru nodded and smiled serenely. ‘Thanks. Good night.’ 

\--- 

Alone in the darkened room, Yuzuru closed his eyes and focused on listening to his current condition, body and heart. His body was sore in various parts, mostly from the effort of skating throughout the week, pushing himself much further than was sensible. In his heart, he felt calmer than he had for weeks. It seemed that confronting new aspects of himself could be a recipe for success – certainly an experiment to repeat. It seemed funny that this whole little journey of discovery had been started by his physiotherapist, and he had only scratched the surface of new possibilities. Maybe next time, he could experiment more with the ropes, the dizzying feeling of constriction.. 

But there was no knowing when ‘next time’ would be - above all, this was a rare treat. A birthday treat, a five-quad-free-treat, something to be savoured in the form of memories and to be repeated rarely, carefully. Physical pleasure wasn’t something to be indulged in lightly, but knowing what worked best on the rare occasions he had deserved it was valuable information indeed. Pleased with the feeling that the positive experiences of this week almost outweighed the pains of defeat, Yuzuru drifted off to deep sleep, unbothered by any cravings.

**Author's Note:**

> so this story started with me thinking the image of yuzu doing kaatsu training is pretty hot, and then thinking 'what if that would lead him to experiment with bdsm stuff', but in the end this became a bit softer 'journey of sexual self-discovery' type of fic. i'm not sure the pacing works, but oh well. it's just some unbeta'd smut. sorry.


End file.
